I am the last barman ferret.
I squeeze fabulous cocktails from my furry teats.
Old men get stinky on the fluids I secrete.
The sawdust from my cage, the schnapps made from mange,
The crepuscular grooving,
The cardboard tubing!
I made things with spit and fuzz, I eat red squirrel, even though they’re my cous-
I make drinks that pack a bite
Fellas- do you know who’s nibbling your ladies tonight?
The sable-tipped dick
in that Dawson’s Creek chick.
The pine martin fling, the ring-worm-aling.
Britain, you wana see the neat little harness I’ve got,
But if you want a hob-goblin thrill in your jill,
I’ll be up your trouser leg like a shot.